I know who I want to take me home

Good times

Well, its been a long time since i've updated this thing. Hilary has been bugging me to update here so here you go. As you probably already know, I have a girlfriend now. Her name is Aubree. SHe has more energy than I do. I'm told that i need someone that can handle MY energy, so if she has more. its gotta be good. My parents grounded me for bad grades, and now that they are up they are being assholes, thinking that i have all this time to do things for them. Because they are too lazy to do it themselves. Well, friday is the zapzone thing for the band. I should be going but who knows... my parents are probably gonna be assholes about that too. Next week starts christmas break... oh excuse me. Holiday break. i'm supposed to be doing a sleep deprevation study. its like a point extra credit for every hour past 16 hours that you remain awake... bwahahah... Probably doing a LAN party at ski's so i can stay up longer. That all depends if my parents are gonna be jerks or not. I really do NOT want to live here after i graduate. I wont be able to stand it. I wont be able to take it.

I'm gonna start a new tradition...atleast with my own blog... every post, im going to tell everyone one of my fears/things people dont know. just so i can get them off my chest, because i feel as if i'm going to explode. or implode. or just plode...

GREATEST fear: My father. I'm deathly afraid of my dad. not so much him in general. He's raised me in such a way, where i'm deathly afraid of dissapointing him. To the point where if I lie to him, i panic. I freak out if i even THINK about doing something remotely different. I'm afraid of what he thinks.I break down if i do dissapoint him. I try my hardest just to get him to say 'good job'. We used to be best friends... now i can't even see him without there being a problem... there is always something wrong. I don't know if it will ever be the same... but i know i'll probably always be afraid of dissapointing him.

posted by Matt @ 6:12 PM